Sunday, December 21, 2008

Dear People Who Go to the Movies,

The people sitting in front of you would greatly appreciate it if you didn't talk the whole time. If you feel the need to discuss the movie with your friend, please wait until it comes out on video.

Allowing your child to put his feet up on the seats in front of him is quite annoying to the people sitting in those seats. I believe the Red Cross has a list of qualified babysitters. Call one next time you want to go to the movies.

Please explain to your teenage daughter that running down the aisle and loudly announcing that "dad wants to know such-and-such" really irritates the people sitting directly in front of you. You know, the ones who paid $8.25 to enjoy the movie. Also, why did you opt not to follow the example set by millions of parents who accompany their teens to the movies and sit behind them? I would have preferred that, because then you wouldn't be sitting behind me.

I don't mean to single you out, rude ladies and annoying little boy who sat behind us. You weren't the only ones who practically ruined the movie-going experience. Note to the people in the back of the theater (the ones with the wailing baby): Polite people exit the theater when they can't calm their child.

Perhaps I would be more tolerant of obnoxious people at the theater if I could placate myself with good movie candy such as gummy bears or Reese's Pieces. However, since our movie theater has no good candy to offer, I have no choice but to request that next time a movie I want to see is playing, you stay home.

If I Wanted Audio Commentary, I Would Have Waited for the DVD Version

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